Essay Preview: Position Paper
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When it comes to the world today, I find that there are more similarities than differences between males and females. The majority is not by much, however when it comes to the way males and females communicated within their groups, there seems to be more similarities between the two. According to the average effect size found, approximately 85% of men and women overlap in their scores across the various psychological variables (pg. 10). The text in chapter 1 explains that men and women are more similar in the way we gossip. Gossip was always thought to be a female form of communication and if men were seen partaking in this mode to communication that they were considered be “acting like a female.” However, men like to gossip, or talk, about any given topic that they might be interested in. Men just feel that the word gossip is related to women, however men to it just as often as women or maybe a little less. Another example the book gives about similar traits between men and women is that both use conversation as a way to talk for talks sake (44). This means that men and women use most of their conversation tools as a way of casual interactions between friends. When friends get together they usually engage in casual chit-chat.
In the first sentence in chapter four, the author explains that women smile more often than men. I find this to be true, however in my situation, I feel, being a male, that I smile more than the average woman. Smiling is something that I find others enjoy. There are common stops within my daily routine where I go somewhere and the people love to see me because I always have smile on my face and that makes them smile. This usually puts everyone in a better mode. That is until I leave again. But I do feel women smile more than men, which pisses me off, because its not that hard to do and everyone enjoys it. I smile a lot and even though my friends may not like it, I feel everyone should smile more often. It would make this world a friendlier place to be. Chapter five discusses sex differences within an organization. I dont think there is much I can talk about with this chapter primarily because there are a lot of differences between males and females in organization life. The way women lead is far different from the way males lead. This chapter goes on to say that male leaders tend to have the “right stuff” to lead. So in order to have similar characteristics within a leadership position females must figure out what that “right stuff” consist of and must nail down that style.
I think when it comes to relationships and seeking the best partner to move on with both males and females are looking for the same type of qualities within each sex. Chapter six explains that women most value stable, trustworthy, intimate, and culturally successful men. I think men seek the same thing in relationship. I know I do. When it comes to biological differences, males and females both adapted crucial survival skills. Its just both didnt receive the same, they received different skills. So they are similar in that they both developed essential skills communicating. Women are superior in nonverbal receiving ability, whereas men were far superior in spatial skills. The book explains a lot of differences between sexes; however those differences are hard to see if you live in the same area your whole life. These differences the book talks about occur between males and females from different cultures. If a person grows up and lives in the same area, he/she only knows that type of person. And when out-of-towners come in, they are easily spotted by that person. I feel this book explains a lot of the differences between sexes and not enough similarities. But I will find them.
The text explains in chapter seven that humans, as in us at this time, are generally polygamous. This means that we mate with more than one person. However, both males and females have a paradoxical tendency to pair a bond (129). This means that though we can mate with as many partners as we want, both sexes are still looking for someone they can settle down with. Just another way males and females are similar.
When we revisited the Different Cultures Thesis in chapter eight, I was able to find that both men and women highly value the supportive and expressive skills of their partners much more than they do the instrumental skills of their partners. What his means is that both men and women find that providing support and comfort and providing ego support are much more important than the skills of persuasion and giving information. The studies shown in chapter eight suggest that men and women have substantially similar communication values. Men and women place high value on supportive and expressive communication skills (142,143). The DCT was wrong however in its evaluations when it predicted that men and women were different with regard to their goals in support situations. The goals between the males and females in specific situations were mainly influenced by the features of the situation rather than by gender (144). What this tells me is that men and women when focused on a task at hand will work hard the task and use the correct tools to achieve certain goals rather than make it a gender issue. A gender issue is not being able to work with a group because it is mainly males or females. When focused on a task males and females can work together to accomplish the task.
As it states in the first paragraph in chapter ten, how an individual presents themselves, whether male or female, is in large part an accomplishment of their language (179). This is similar in both sexes and says that a person is represented by the way they talk. If a person thinks theyre smart, then they will talk as if they were smart. As stated by R Davis in my VGA group, “Ive come to believe that most of the women in my life have a very masculine presentation, following many of the communication traits supposedly used only by men.” I feel for me, I try to look and talk as if I know a lot about the subject being discussed. Its all about adaptation and how you mold yourself to the environment at hand. You try to talk the talk. Also, the use of language can get into places if you are able to use that language correctly and wisely. For instance, when meeting new people, whom you have never met before, you try to use their type of language to better fit in with them and the more likely you are to be accepted.
Now that I have identified some information from the text that coincides with the position I hold towards there being more similarities than differences between males and females, I will know look at pieces from the text that are inconsistent with my position. First, let me say that this book seems to go the opposite direction I went. The text