Teen Sex
Essay Preview: Teen Sex
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You understand the importance of sex education. But dont count on classroom instruction alone. Although the basics may be covered in health class, your child might not hear — or understand — everything he or she needs to know. Thats where you come in. Awkward as it may be, sex education is a parents responsibility. By reinforcing and supplementing what your child learns in school, you can help your child make good decisions about sex.
Sex is a staple of news, entertainment and advertising. Its often hard to avoid this ever-present topic. But when parents and children need to talk, it isnt always so easy. If you wait for the perfect moment, you might miss the best opportunities. Instead, think of sex education as an ongoing conversation. Here are some ideas to help you get started — and keep the discussion going.
Seize the moment. When a TV program or music video raises issues about responsible sexual behavior, use it as a springboard for discussion. If a good topic comes up at an inconvenient time, say youd like to talk more about it later — then actually do so.
Keep it low-key. Dont pressure your child to talk about sex. Simply broach the subject when youre alone with your child. Sometimes everyday moments — such as riding in the car, putting away groceries or sharing a late-night snack — offer the best opportunities to talk.
Be honest. If youre uncomfortable, say so — but explain that its important to keep talking. If you dont know how to answer your childs questions, offer to find the answers or look them up together.
Be direct. Clearly state your feelings about specific issues, such as oral sex and intercourse. Present the risks objectively, including emotional pain, sexually transmitted diseases and unplanned pregnancy. Explain that oral sex isnt a risk-free alternative to intercourse.
Consider your childs point of view. Dont lecture your child or rely on scare tactics to discourage sexual activity. Instead, listen carefully. Understand your childs pressures, challenges and concerns.
Move beyond the facts. Your child needs accurate information about sex. But its just as important to talk about feelings, attitudes and values. Examine questions of ethics and responsibility in the context of your personal or religious beliefs.
Invite more discussion. Let your child know that its OK to talk with you about sex whenever he or she has questions or concerns. Reward questions by saying, “Im glad you came to me.”
Addressing tough topics
Sex education includes abstinence, date rape, homosexuality and other tough topics. Be prepared for questions like these:
How will I know Im ready for sex? Various factors — peer pressure, curiosity and loneliness, to name a few — steer some teenagers into early sexual activity. But theres no rush. Remind your child that its OK to wait. Sex is an adult behavior. In the meantime, there are many other ways to express affection — intimate talks, long walks, holding hands, listening to music, dancing, kissing, touching and hugging.
What if my boyfriend or girlfriend wants to have sex, but I dont? Explain that no one should have sex out of a sense